Five Minutes Can Make a Difference

Jellyfish Review 2016 Indonisia

This morning I woke at 5:25, five minutes earlier than my usual 5:30, looked over and saw Elaine in her usual covered head to toe under her sheet and I went to the bathroom to take my shower. We had an old-fashioned bathroom, claw-foot tub, and shower with a circular metal post to wrap the curtain around and a one-time fashionable powder blue toilet and sink.

That’s not the bathroom I was standing in. This was chrome and glass with a jetted tub for two and a glass shower with a seat and multiple shower heads. The toilet and sinks were crimson to match the shower and tub as well as the paint job and ceramic tiles.

There was an electric razor and after shave lotion neither of which I use and hand crèmes and face lotions with French names. I walked back out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. The lump in the bed appeared larger than Elaine’s lump and there was someone lying on my side of the bed.

I ran out to the unfamiliar hall opened the front door and peered around to see the house number which was 22. Just as the house alarm went off, Mr. Lump came running out of the bedroom with  a golf club (I believe it was a 3 iron) and he demanded to know what I was doing in his house

He looked at my nakedness and held the club like he was going to swing a baseball bat. “Wrong grip for a 3,” I said.

“Angie, call the police and tell them we have a naked burglar in the house.”

Her curiosity got the better of her and out of the bedroom she walked with her cell phone and wearing a terry cloth robe. “Hold on a minute, honey, this guy can’t hurt a flea with his club,” pointing to my privates.

Mr. Lump put his arm around Mrs. Lump and they walked back into the bedroom giggling.

“Oh by the way,’ he said pointing. “There’s a jump suit in the garage I use it to change my oil; you can wear it to go back to wherever you’re supposed to be. I heard the bed creek and looked around. I took a glass paperweight from their collection on the desk on walked out to the garage looking for the jumpsuit.

: