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President"s Day Sale

Decasp 2017

October 21, 2017

President"s Day Sale
​We’re practically giving our cars away on this President’s Day the ads on TV and the newspapers as well as the flyers and signs on the sides of buses, cabs and benches boldly exclaimed so my being almost in the market for a new car I went down to New Car Alley where all the dealerships were located and went from one to the other looking at their best deals shown to me by their best salesmen all wearing blue blazers, tan slacks, blue shirts with white collars open two buttons at the neck and a pen in their hand and the first question they all asked was what brings you out today and I tell them their ads that say they’re practically giving their cars away and they ask are you ready to buy a new car and I tell them straight out that I’m almost in the market for a new car and they should show me their absolute best deal and they did but the models they did show as practically giving away were all stripped down models of their best selling cars so by the time you added FM to the AM radio, power to the roll down windows, reasonable horsepower, plastic covered seats like your grandmother used to put on her furniture and other odds and ends like a full year warrantee, windshield washers, a second sun visor, back window defroster, a second set of keys and then finding out they were sending you on your way with only 2 gallons of gas they were overcharging by 5% and I told them so and went on my way to get in line at Wal-Mart for the real bargains of the day in white goods, but first I stopped at Costco because I’d built up an appetite and would sample my way around the store a few times and get lunch out of the way but when I showed back up at the Italian sausage lady the second time and took her full, just off the griddle samples, she called the manager who escorted me out again and reminded me there was no such thing as a free lunch.


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